post hoc addendum

The primary reason I wrote the preceding post was to organize my thoughts concerning a particular matter. Also, if anyone reads this, please use it as a prayer request for myself and for my friend.

I have a friend. I would say her name is Sally, but I know a Sally. So we'll call her Pocahontas. Pocahontas is not involved in the local church. After Butch's series on ekklesia and reading "Stop Dating the Church" I have come to realize that this is a pretty serious thing. I don't think being involved in a local church is another thing to put on your To Do list so you can check it off. I don't think it should become legalistic. But I do think that it is a sign of a growing believer who is falling in love with God and the things God loves. So to not be involved in a local church is a symptom of a deeper issue as well.

Pocahontas doesn't have a vehicle, which makes it difficult for her to be involved to the extent she claims she wants to be. Meet Sacajawea. Sacajawea also doesn't have a vehicle (duh, she walked everywhere with Lewis and Clark). Sacajawea attends a local church faithfully, is involved in a children's ministry, discipleship class, and even attends extra church meetings. I can understand Pocahontas feeling discouraged asking for rides on a regular basis. However, I also think that this is a pride issue that needs to be dealt with. Sacajawea is able to do it, despite any misgivings she might have or feeling like she's a burden.

I have offered on numerous occasions to give Pocahontas a ride. The majority of the time, I initiate this. I want Pocahontas to know that she's not a burden and that I truly don't mind giving her rides. However, she never asks for them: I have to offer. Again, I see pride as an issue, but I sense something deeper.

I don't think Pocahontas wants to be involved in her local church. On more than a few occasions, I have been scheduled to give her a ride to church and she ended up not going. Many times, she oversleeps and claims that she can't get ready in time and decides to forgo attending completely. This morning, she claimed to be nauseas. After all I've done to help her get to church, I'm inclined to believe that she's not telling the truth. The only other option I feel could be possible is that she is overcome with such extreme mental distress over the thought of attending that she makes herself physically sick.

Pocahontas has a brilliant social life. She often stays out late after work to hang out with coworkers. The people she primarily associates with do not profess to be Christians. "He who walks with the wise grows wise, but a companion of fools suffers harm." (Prov. 13:20) Pocahontas does not socialize with families; when she needs advice or encouragement, she must go to her peers--people who have less than or equal to the life experience she has.

Pocahontas has had a rough life. It would not be prudent for me to go into details, but there are considerable obstacles that will need to be overcome for Pocahontas to live abundantly. However, I have recently met many people (such as Sacajawea) who have had similar set-backs and are succeeding quite well in overcoming them.

I have known Pocahontas for a while now, and I have yet to see good fruit in her life. I'm starting to wonder if she even has a personal relationship with the Lord. Perhaps she just thinks she does and goes through the motions (on occasion). This would explain the lack of desire, the lack of victory, the lack of obedience.

If anyone has read this far, please pray for me. The Lord is teaching me about boldness right now, and I have initiated some conversations with Pocahontas concerning her lack of involvement in the church. Now, however, I feel that I most go deeper in my attempt to speak the Truth in love. If she is in fact not a believer, the solution is easy! Praise God! On the other hand, if it is true, it also means that I will probably offend her. Please pray for boldness despite the probability that our relationship will be hurt. Please pray that I would speak the truth in love, seeing Pocahontas as Christ sees her and desiring for her to be right with the Lord--and seeing this as more important than my own comfort. Please pray for wisdom in knowing when to speak (or if at all!) and how to approach it.

Most of all, please pray for Pocahontas. Pray that whatever is the root cause of her disobedience, that the Lord would convict her, that she would get right and would begin living from victory instead of in shame.